Cheating Wife ?
Taken from
Askmen.com
You're in a relationship with a wonderful girl, which makes it even
harder to fathom that she may be cheating on you. A cheating wife or
girlfriend is a concern that haunts many a man in relationships, and the
thought of your lady putting her paws on another man makes your skin
crawl.
So how can you spot a cheating wife or girlfriend, and what do you do
about it?
Although there are signs that can indicate that your girlfriend is
two-timing you, the thing to keep in mind is that you're looking for a
change in her behavior patterns. The key to spotting a cheating wife or
girlfriend is change , so if she's always been a guy's girl and has a
lot of male friends, don't get all paranoid when you hear that she was
seen with her friend Max at the movies, for example.The following are
5 signs that she may be letting someone else taste her pudding:
1- She's no longer as needy
If she was never able to go shopping, exercise, or cross the street
alone, and she suddenly doesn't need your company, it may mean that
someone else is filling your shoes. It's possible that she just needs
time to herself, but if she's unusually independent when she used to be
overly needy, it may signal that she's just no longer as needy... of
you.
2- She no longer gets angry
She used to get angry if you didn't want to meet her for lunch or come
out with her and her friends, but now everything you do is all right by
her. Once upon a time, your every move had to be premeditated, but now
all the small things you used to mess up aren't enraging her. This could
be a good thing, but you wonder why she no longer cares.
3- She's being secretive
She's no longer sharing her daily events with you, and in order to find
out what she's doing, you'd have to break open her diary because she's
not volunteering any information regarding the goings-on of her life. Of
course, you could always ask...
4- She places the focus on you
When you do ask her questions, she turns the tables on you. The former
chatterbox's batteries have run out and when you ask her how her night
was, mum's the only word. It's now all about you, you, you, rather than
"I did this" and "I went here last night."
5- She showers you with pleasure
Now that it's all about you, your girlfriend is always complimenting
you, asking you to go out, giving you "I love you" cards for no reason
whatsoever, and even offering to wash your car and watch the boxing
match with you. While these gestures are more than sweet, it's this kind
of overcompensating behavior that can make one suspicious. If she's
bombarding you with niceties, it might be nice to know what's really
going on.
As I said earlier, these signs aren't the be-all end-all that she's been
unfaithful. Change is the most important factor that must be evaluated
if you find yourself suspicious of her, so look at how she used to be,
and how she is now.
If she's spending less time with you, for example, it could either
mean that she's avoiding you because she feels guilty for her actions,
or she just doesn't care to spend as much time with you. The latter
could be a sign of cheating, but it may also be the cause of why .
Now there's no need to get all paranoid and suspicious. If you think
that her recent behavior isn't adding up or you catch her lying, then
do not accuse her of cheating. Think about whether she's given you a
reason to believe that she's two-timing you, or whether it's your
imagination running wild because you're afraid of losing her.You
have a feeling
If you think she may be cheating, approach her but don't bring up the
cheating. Ask her if everything is okay, and tell her that she's been
acting different lately. Give her examples of how her behavior has
changed, and tell her that you want to know and understand if there's a
reason.
You want to open the lines of communication and encourage her to open
up about what is troubling her in the relationship, and proceed from
there. Approaching a cheating wife can be a delicate situation.
You have more than a sneaking suspicion
If you have adequate reason to believe that she's cheating on you, do
not accuse or threaten her because if you're wrong, she'll feel that you
really don't trust her. Rather than exclaiming, "I know what's going
on!" or "Who have you been messing around with?", ask, "Is there
something I should know about?" or "I have reason to believe that you're
not being 100% honest with me."
This may seem passive, but you want to approach the topic carefully
because if you're wrong, you may be messing up big time. But if you're
right, then you have permission to raise Cain.
You catch her or have concrete evidence
If there is no way that this is a misunderstanding and you are positive
that she's been pawing another dog, then you can approach her with more
assertion. Tell her what you saw, how it makes you feel, and what you
plan to do about it.
Can you ever trust her again?
Being unfaithful in a relationship is horrible, but there is a bigger
picture here. You have to realize that a cheating wife may be the result
of a problem in your relationship. If she's deceiving you by getting
cuddly with another man, it could mean that she is going elsewhere to
find what your relationship lacks, which doesn't make her actions right,
only less despicable.
Forgive and Forget
If you discover that she cheated on you, there are a few questions you
must ask yourself:
Can you trust her again?If the answer is No:
You can't get back together.
If the answer is Yes:
It may take time, but you can give it another try. You'll have to tell
her that it'll be hard to trust her, but with her help and time, it can
happen.
Why do you think she did it?If she doesn't tell you why:
You'll have to evaluate whether you can still forgive her.
If it has to do with your relationship:
When you're ready, you can work on the problems in your relationship.
Is your relationship worth another try?
If you can move past her deceit and give her another chance, then
when you're ready, sit down, talk to her, and try to understand why she
did it. There may be no reason at all (it could just be the fault of
stupidity with a pinch of vodka), but if there is a reason why she
cheated on you, then ignoring why she did it can lead it to happen again
-- and then you'll be cheating yourself.
We all make mistakes, which doesn't make cheating acceptable, but if
she shows remorse for her actions and if she's worth the effort of
giving it another shot, then you can forgive although you may need more
time to forget.
Source:
http://www.askmen.com/dating/heidi/41c_dating_girl.html
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